Tuesday, July 21, 2009

The Heterosexual Questionnaire

The Heterosexual Questionnaire was created back in 1972 to put heterosexual people in the shoes of a gay person for just a moment. Questions and assumptions made of Gays and Lesbians that are unfair, are reversed and this time asked to the straight people.

This is a fun survey, but also an activist survey. Please repost this to your email list, myspace bulletin, use it in a group setting, have fun with it but also let the point be made.

1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality?

2. When and where did you decide you were a heterosexual?

3. Is it possible this is just a phase and you will out grow it?

4. Is it possible that your sexual orientation has stemmed from a neurotic fear of others of the same sex?

5. Do your parents know you are straight? Do your friends know- how did they react?

6. If you have never slept with a person of the same sex, is it just possible that all you need is a good gay lover?

7. Why do you insist on flaunting your heterosexuality... can’t you just be who you are and keep it quiet?

8. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?

9. Why do heterosexuals try to recruit others into this lifestyle?

10. A disproportionate majority of child molesters are heterosexual... Do you consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers?

11. Just what do men and women do in bed together? How can they truly know how to please each other, being so anatomically different?

12. With all the societal support marriage receives, the divorce rate is spiraling. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?

13. How can you become a whole person if you limit yourself to compulsive, exclusive heterosexuality?

14. Considering the menace of overpopulation how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual?

15. Could you trust a heterosexual therapist to be objective? Don't you feel that he or she might be inclined to influence you in the direction of his orher leanings?

16. There seem to very few happy heterosexuals. Techniques have been developed that might enable you to change if you really want to.

17. Have you considered trying aversion therapy?

- Martin Rochlin, Ph.D., 1972

62 comments:

Jerry Maneker said...

An excellent post!

Anonymous said...

I will pass this out to students in my class, thank you.

Anonymous said...

Frikkin' awesome! This says a lot in just a few, curt lines.

Anonymous said...

This is great! Both hilarious and very cutting. I'll have to show this to some people. =D One of my classmates is organizing a Day of Silence on our campus and I think she might find this helpful.

Queers United said...

thanks eowynjedi i think this would be a fantastic tool as part of the Day of Silence, let us know how it goes!

Anonymous said...

It's a reasonable test. Here goes...

1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality?
A. God created human beings to be male or female as His means for them to beget children, therefore God "caused" my heterosexuality.

2. When and where did you decide you were a heterosexual?
A. During adolescence I cooperated with my innate God given heterosexuality. I detached from my mother and increasingly identified with my father and began the process of settling into the natural order of male/female heterosexuality.

3. Is it possible this is just a phase and you will out grow it?
A. Not unless male/female complementarity, marriage, and the reproductive continuation of mankind are also a "phase"

4. Is it possible that your sexual orientation has stemmed from a neurotic fear of others of the same sex?
A. Not unless male/female complementarity, marriage, and the reproductive continuation of mankind are now "neurotic."

5. Do your parents know you are straight? Do your friends know- how did they react?
A. Friends know, parents know, wife knows and child knows. I can't really say, since ordinary behaviour in the natural order of life is not something people "react" to. It just is.


6. If you have never slept with a person of the same sex, is it just possible that all you need is a good gay lover?
A. Not possible. The true meaning of love is the total self giving of self to the other-which means that all sexual acts are open to the creation of children. Anything else, is a counterfeit-call it like, attraction, distraction, lust-just don't call it love as the God, the source of all earthly love intends it.

7. Why do you insist on flaunting your heterosexuality... can’t you just be who you are and keep it quiet?
A. Heteronormative behaviors such as marriage and raising a family are a mirror of God's glory-so one person's celebration is another person's "flaunting."

8. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?
A. A projective leading question. I think if one compares the ad content of a homosexual publication such as "the Advocate" versus a heterosexual publication such as "Parenting World" it's clear which group emphasizes sex.

9. Why do heterosexuals try to recruit others into this lifestyle?
A. A projective leading question. Normality os not a "style." Marriage and family are normal, and normal is that which God designed for the good of the individual and society.

10. A disproportionate majority of child molesters are heterosexual... Do you consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers?
A. In raw numbers, true. But false when the statistics are adjusted for incident frequency and group representation in society. According to such valid measures, gays are 40x more likely to commit a sexual offenses against a child, so it is less safe to expose children to homosexuals.

11. Just what do men and women do in bed together? How can they truly know how to please each other, being so anatomically different?
A. Men and women can please each other perfectly because their natures complement one another. Same sex attraction amounts to a mirror of self. Because it centers on the self it is inherently narcissistic and objectifying.

12. With all the societal support marriage receives, the divorce rate is spiraling. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?
A. A leading question. Divorce rates are high in secular marriages but never as high as the fleeting relationships of gay relationships or "marriage." In Catholic marriages for example, the rate of is 200 successes to 1 failure.

13. How can you become a whole person if you limit yourself to compulsive, exclusive heterosexuality?
A. Exclusive heterosexuality os God's plan for humanity. To cooperate with God is to become a whole person.

14. Considering the menace of overpopulation how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual?
A. Overpopulation is a Malthusian myth. 70% of Japan is primeval forest and unpopulated mountain ranges and yet this tiny country supports over 200 million persons comfortably.

15. Could you trust a heterosexual therapist to be objective? Don't you feel that he or she might be inclined to influence you in the direction of his orher leanings?
A. Unlike same-sex attracted persons, heterosexuals don't derive their primary identity from their sexual attraction. The risk, therefore, is minimal.

16. There seem to very few happy heterosexuals. Techniques have been developed that might enable you to change if you really want to.
Even if that were true, why exacerbate the problem? The rates of suicide, depression, substance abuse and self-harming behaviors are much higher in same-sex attracted persons.

17. Have you considered trying aversion therapy?
A. I love God, I love my wife, I love marriage and I love children. I have an aversion to therapy which questions what is normal.

Unknown said...

I love the previous comment, because it's so unintentionally funny for a variety of reasons:

1.) You are anonymous. Thanks for sharing your opinion, but not having enough pride in it to reveal your identity.

2.) Overpopulation isn't a myth, nor is global warming. It's not worth arguing science with a fundamentalist though.

3.) Actually heterosexuals put a huge emphasis on sexuality. I can't walk down the street without seeing a near naked woman on a billboard for storage. (I'm not exaggerating either.)

4.) You don't understand subtle humor.

Anonymous said...

This is great! I shared this on my blog with credit given to the author and to this blog where I found this! I had not seen this before, it is excellent!
Take care,
Wendy

Anonymous said...

I really love this questionnaire! The anonymous commenter definitely supplemented it with his/her humourous answers.

Queers United said...

haha thanks cary, agreed, I wish anonymous would post more humorous posts in the future.

Joey said...

The homophobic Straight Pride reggae march is being held in Brooklyn on Aug. 31. Maybe the protestors should hand those questions out to the marchers.

Laurie said...

I like that survey. Makes me wanna
make some smarta$$ remarks about
hetros. I will have to put this
on my blog and answer them :D

HUGS!!!

I don't mind y'all using that photo
as your background. It is one of
the best ones that I took and I
really like it too.

Queers United said...

joey - i think that would be a fantastic idea, do you know if there is an organized counter demo, id post any details here about it.

laurie - yes please do use the survey the more ppl who read it the more the point gets across. thanks for the graphic, it is really nice as my background, so serene =)

Anonymous said...

Poor "Anonymous," obsessed with US! Obsessed enough to waste "Its" time reading about us, etc.! Instead, if "It" were a good human being, It would be down at the soup kitchens, or the nursing homes, or fostering children with special needs! POOR IT! POOR "ANONYMOUS!" Dear "IT" GET A LIFE! Start by reading the Words of Jesus! "JUDGE NOT LEST YE BE JUDGED!" Now, MY words: BE CAREFUL! NOT EVERYONE YOU INSULT IS GOING TO BE SO KIND! (Of course, I realize you are a "net-troll" which hides behind a screen, not really having a "wife" as you state, BUT a latent "HOMOSEXUAL" FILLED WITH SELF LOATHING! You would NEVER have the nerve to INSULT one of us IN PERSON! POOR IT! CRY YOURSELF TO SLEEP TONIGHT, AND HAVE A WET DREAM THINKING OF MEN!

Queers United said...

AMEN! Larry I couldn't say it better myself.

Tc said...

That was great.

Might come in handy in a training seminar....

thanks!

Joey said...

queers united : Don't know of any counter demos, yet. But it's still early.

CrackerLilo said...

Joey, what a fantastic idea! My best friend is a Jamaican bi woman with a same-sex partner; this has broken her heart. I'll help spread the word!

CrackerLilo said...

PS--I too love how Anonymous tried and failed to shame us.

Legion XXXVI said...

Oh, wow... color my face red!

I um... thought that anonymous was trying to be funny.

I guess I just see humor in everything...

Anonymous said...

Brilliant! I adore the survey. Many thanks to Martin Rochlin.

Anonymous said...

Cute survey! I definitely think more people need to look at this. The anonymous person who replied so seriously seemed to miss the point completely. I've just sent this to a few people who definitely need to rethink a few things, so it should be interesting IF they respond; and if so, it'll be interesting to find out what sort of response(s) they have.

Anonymous said...

hahahaha! i was laughing myself silly when reading this survey! it's awesome! i shall post this on my blog. thanks for making my day! and it really does put into perspective the kind of abuse our heterosexual society heap on us. thanks once again!

josh

Jason Hughes said...

Great survey! Thanks for sharing it...

From 1972, eh? Its a shame that even these many years later, the majority of the world doesn't ask themelves these questions wheneve they cringe or fear a hmosexual person...

Anonymous said...

Is it true that the gay community lack understanding into the life they live and why they are gay ? Would Guys choose to be straight if they could ? If not why not? What would happen to the world, if everyone choice not to have children, just because didn't appeal to them ?

Queers United said...

jason - thanks, we still have much work to do in promoting tolerance.

anonymous - i don't understand what you mean. the world is already overpopulated so gays and lesbians are natures natural birth control in my opinion.

ReneeG said...

This is a great quiz, I just may throw a lead-in to it on your site from mine, if you don't mind. Sharing is caring, right? This is just too good not to pass on...

Queers United said...

Renee - thank you and yes please do pass it on, the more eyes the better :)

Chris Murphy said...

anonymous, in case you didn't know, many gays and lesbians choose to be parents. Wanting to be a parent is not something that comes from orientation. Just like there are straight people who could care less about being parents.

Oh, and if everyone were gay, the world would not end. We, as humans, are able to think objectively, and would see that inter-sex relations of some sort would have to occur. Given todays technology, if we were to ALL turn gay (unlikely, considering the low percentage of GLBT people), we would still have ways for those who wish to parent, parent

Anonymous said...

haha!! great survey! can't wait to show it my friends, they're gonna love it :p

anonymous dude who filled it out: you're an idiot

other anonymous dude: the BBC recently did a documentary mini series called "The Meaning of Me" where they debated the "nature v nurture" arguement... one of the people they chose for this was gay actor John Barrowman.... Barrowman has never once questioned why he's gay, and has never really cared, but since he's become such a huge role model not just in the UK, but world wide for the G/L community, he said yes.... on set he met a man who "was gay" and decided to be "hetero" again b/c he believed that gays and lesbians couldn't have the "white picket fence"... Barrowman countered with the fact that not only is he gay, but he's also living the "white picket" fantasy in that he has a wonderful partner of 16 years, they just recently had a civil union in 2007 to celebrate their 15 year aniversary... they have three dogs, a flat in Londan, a flat in Cardiff where he does most of his filming, they're building a beautiful six bedroom, beach front house in Cardiff, and are looking to adopt to help fill those bedrooms... i hope this answers your question

Anonymous said...

This made my day! I'll make sure to pass it along ;)

Unknown said...

Perfect!! Translated in my language. Have a few candidates in mind, for a little questionnaire...

Anonymous said...

So I just have to say to anonymous who did answer the questionnaire - I can't say as I agree with the majority of what you say. Even as a heterosexual trying to answer this. These just - don't follow my belief systems. But either way, as a person who has studied both psychology and sociology; I have to completely disagree with your response to #10. As far as most of the rest of your questions - these are based off your belief system. And nobody has the right to criticize those things. However, this one is a false representation of facts (although I have to acknowledge that the question is also misleading).

10. A disproportionate majority of child molesters are heterosexual... Do you consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers?
A. In raw numbers, true. But false when the statistics are adjusted for incident frequency and group representation in society. According to such valid measures, gays are 40x more likely to commit a sexual offenses against a child, so it is less safe to expose children to homosexuals.

The fact of the matter is that pedophilia is a psychological disorder. Yes, some pedophiles prefer little boys, some prefer little girls. But you will find that in the vast majority of pedophiles, they do NOT prefer adult males OR females. Pedophiles are most often strictly that -- pedophiles. Its the age that attracts them. Not the gender.

Therefore; child molesters are neither hetero- nor homo- sexual. They are pedophiles. There is a reason they are even further to the fringe of society than many people tend to relegate homosexuals to.

Anonymous said...

Man, I LOVE this. Have to post it on my blog too. I'm also printing out a copy to keep handy next time I see the evangelical kids at university giving the GLBT crowd (or, the TOLERANT people) a hard time, as they invariably do. Thanks for sharing :)

Anonymous said...

i read through this and laughed it's hilarious and so true

Shauna said...

Buffy and William took the fun out of this one, darn it...tonight is a boring night.

Hannah said...

I'm straight but I identify with the issues that have been raised by the passage of this ban because my husband was an illegal immigrant from Mexico and my government spent a fair amount of its time letting us know that our marriage wasn't good enough for protection either. He was deported one week after I gave birth to our second child and the radio was filled with bigots suggesting that immigrant bodies are transgressive and dangerous - the same language that is so often used to frame the debate about homosexuality. The issue of gay marriage is larger than one particular demographic - it is important to everyone that we all be allowed to make decisions about our personal lives, control who is in charge when we are incapacitated, who can make decisions when we are unable, and whose love makes us a family. Nobody's right to live and love as they deserve is safe while anyone's right to do so is under attack. It is my hope that people like "anonymous" are becoming fewer and fewer and that I at least, will contribute two children to the world who understand and love people based on the "content of their character" and not on the color of their flag. Best wishes - Hannah Rose Mendoza

Anonymous said...

Darn it, I wish I could find ReligiousNut ("anonymous") funny, but I just found his answers snarky and hateful and upsetting. He didn't convince me to change my mind about anything, he just offended me further. Thanks pal, you get your kicks hurting people? Calling us abnormal? Your God should be ashamed of you.

Queers United said...

I love this post so much I gotta bring it back every few months for new readers.

Anonymous said...

While his comments were interesting, and basically what I've been hearing all my life, so nothing new, you didn't shock me, or make me feel ashamed to be gay.

I do find it interesting, that he not only follows this blog, but took the time out of his day to respond to it.

T. R Xands said...

Oh wow, I've heard of this survey before but never actually seen it. I am so reposting this everywhere.

Kelly said...

Thanks for posting! :)

Unfortunately, like the anonymous poster above, people will still find ways to avoid the real issue and create answers to the questions that suite them. Or, they may not even read past the first question. :(

Artemis Rich said...

This is brilliant! Definitely reposting this. Thanks!

Anonymous said...

I found this in the archives once. I always get a kick out of reversals.

Question 7 really drives the point of my straight privilege home for me. I talk about my "boyfriend" and expect nobody to bat an eye, and nobody does. But if it were a girlfriend...heaven forbid I mention the person's gender, because I'd be "flaunting my sexuality." WTF? We straights really do flaunt our sexuality. And I think the reason for that is because it allows us to kind of brag about our normalcy and our success. "I have a wonderful opposite sex partner just like I'm supposed to have. Praise me for being happy and successful!"

Anonymous said...

And just for fun: my own answers.

1) I don't know if it's mostly nature, or largely nurture, actually. I was slow to develop any kind of "feelings," and the fact that it was expected that I'd develop them for boys may have influenced me to look at boys in that way but not girls. I've had so few romantic or sexual attractions, it seems like it could have gone either way. But that it went the way it did, being so weak...it probably is mostly nature.

2) When I was 14, and I recognized my second crush as a crush. I announced this crush to my family when I realized it, thereby "coming out" as straight. I later realized that I'd liked another boy a year earlier than that, but didn't know at the time that those were the kind of feelings that constituted "liking someone."

3) Yes, it's possible. I've had so few attractions, I could almost be asexual. And furthermore, I've occasionally been a little turned on by traditionally "sexy-looking" women. I'm not entirely sure what that means, bit it could mean that my orientation is somewhat fluid, or that I'm bi, even though I've only had "crushes" on boys. It could also just be a matter of being turned on by "sex" and anything symbolizing it.

4) Um...possibly...

5) They all know. They're used to it now, especially since I have a boyfriend. But I think some of them used to occasionally doubt it when I'd gone without love interests or significant others for a long time. They don't bat an eye about it though, and don't mind at all.

6) Maybe...but I'm kind of uncomfortable with sex in general, and have taken a long time to even get to the fooling-around stage.

7) I could...but (a) I think I kind of subconsciously like "bragging" (see above) and (b) if I used gender-neutral terms, people would probably wonder why I was doing that. See, that's the kicker. You're kind of expected to flaunt your sexuality if you're straight.

8) I think it's just a modern cultural trend. Or maybe not...people used to put emphasis on "not" having sex, and get themselves all hot and bothered about it. Hmm. Must be 'cause, like most people, straights have sex drives. And ours is especially problematic 'cause it can lead to unwanted children.

9) Because some of us, like that religious troll above, think that everyone should be like us.

10) Sometimes you just have to take risks in life. If only 2-10% of the population are GLBT, it's gonna be hard to hire gay teachers to protect children from straight pedophiles...

11) From what I've heard, they often *don't* know how to please each other. My SO and I do struggle with it, in fact, because we're not used to pleasing anyone but ourselves. Many just do what's expected of them, regardless of whether their partner is pleased. Others, well, they learn.

12) Seems to be a cultural trend, not related to heterosexuality in itself, but the changing ways our society conceives of relationships in general.

13) Hmm. Very good question. I guess nobody can do everything (or everyone)...

14) Easy. Just use contraceptives, and be careful about what you do in bed. Now if only we could get rid of the political barriers to making contraceptives available to all who want them...

15) Hmm. Just be cautious about the ones who call themselves religious...they are the most likely to try to recruit you. And if they try, fire them.

16) Um...you know, it would almost not be a bad idea, 'cause I wouldn't have to worry about unwanted pregnancy. I could still get STIs though, so if I did any genital-to-genital contact I'd have to make sure to get my pap smears. And it would still be slimy and have all the emotional hangups I have to worry about in a straight relationship. So, probably not worth it.

17) Haha. I don't NEED aversion therapy. I have enough aversion already. I would have been fine just taking care of my own business, and actually had to get out of my comfort zone to fool around with a partner of any stripe.

idappaccayata said...

Fundamentally, the belief that sex and marriage is only about creating brood is the (flawed) logic he builds his argument on. It is obvious that he believes that the government has a duty to ensure that the institution of marriage be reserved exclusively for purposes of creating children. He is therefore inadvertently advocating for the government to:

- Forcibly separate all couples past child-bearing years;
- Forcibly dissolve all heterosexual marriages that do not produce children;
- Separate all heterosexuals who have had their tubes tied or have undergone a vasectomy; and,
- All women with hysterectomies should immediately have their right to marry stripped from them.

If his argument is that marriage can only exist for the sole purpose of reproduction, we must then take that argument to its logical conclusion. I would expect, however, that following his logic would not sit well with anonymous. His post is obviously about his belief that heterosexuals are the favored and superior race and that the others require suppression.

The Anon poster inadvertently adds to the power of this blog post. It must have taken no small amount of time, attention and energy to construct his response in a way that the churlish and hubris nature can somehow pass for a calling to god. Furthermore, he seems unable to understand that his response is the very essence of narcissism.

Anonymous said...

justifying heterosexuality with god eh? Bit thin to rely on. Very amusing questionare. previous comment was very clever and amusing

Anonymous said...

I'm a heterosexual male and found the questionnaire interesting and one of the first replies problematic. So let's go with it.

1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality?
2. When and where did you decide you were a heterosexual?
I can't say what caused it. Maybe the fact we had a bunch of nice looking and intelligent women in College helped a bit. But why didn't I find any attractive males around, I can't say. Is that hormones? Am I sick? When one thinks about it, an attraction that discards 50 % of the population right away (i.e. in my case, other males) is problematic.

3. Is it possible this is just a phase and you will out grow it?

Possible. But I think the only way I'll grow out of it is when I die.

4. Is it possible that your sexual orientation has stemmed from a neurotic fear of others of the same sex?

Don't think so, though maybe having a few male bullies in high school could have been a good reason to stay away from males.

5. Do your parents know you are straight? Do your friends know- how did they react?

Parents know. As for friends, it depends. There was a long time when I was single and not dating either, and by sheer co-incidence, for 3-4 years, most of my friends were male homosexuals. A few of them tried to date me, and strangely enough, all of them disappeared within a couple of months when I found a girlfriend. I hope they weren't afraid of being contaminated by a hetero! (just kidding).

6. If you have never slept with a person of the same sex, is it just possible that all you need is a good gay lover?

I enjoy cuddling but I'm not fond of sex. In other words, for me, the relationship doesn't happen in bed. And to go with question 4, in the millions of males I have met, there is not a single one I would like to cuddle.

7. Why do you insist on flaunting your heterosexuality... can’t you just be who you are and keep it quiet?
I tend to be quiet about it. But it's not a secret either. Basically, if I know you as an acquaintance, I don't care whether about your partner(s) or lack of it. If we get close enough that I invite you and your family for dinner, it's nice to know whether it's a "he" or "she", whether you'll bring in a few kids, etc.

8. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?
Do they?

9. Why do heterosexuals try to recruit others into this lifestyle?
And why do all Conservatives try to recruit others? And why do all (insert your group here) try... Guess that's the sheep in us.

10. A disproportionate majority of child molesters are heterosexual... Do you consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers?

Disproportionate? I don't think so. I wonder if homosexual child molesters are more tempted by boys and heterosexual child molesters are more tempted by girls, but I don't know.

11. Just what do men and women do in bed together? How can they truly know how to please each other, being so anatomically different?
"Censored". As former PM Trudeau said, what happens in one's bedroom is private.

12. With all the societal support marriage receives, the divorce rate is spiralling. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals?
Some would suggest it DOESN'T receive enough support. Why the high rate? Either:
- it's easier to split and rematch because heteros have a larger pool of people to chose from;
- heteros get married and less homos do.
Now that homos have been married for the last 2-3 years (in Canada anyway), it will be interesting to look at divorce statistics.

13. How can you become a whole person if you limit yourself to compulsive, exclusive heterosexuality?

14. Considering the menace of overpopulation how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual?
Growing more food!

15. Could you trust a heterosexual therapist to be objective? Don't you feel that he or she might be inclined to influence you in the direction of his other leanings?
I don't believe in therapists, whatever their sex or persuasion.

Anonymous said...

I just stumbled across this post while googling for gender equality here in Sweden, but as a heterosexual with 100 % support of homosexuality, I have 2 comments to what has been said.

Anonymous said: "I can't really say, since ordinary behaviour in the natural order of life is not something people "react" to. It just is."

- Actually, it was announced not long ago that the natural order of life is both heterosexual, bisexual and homosexual. More than 1500 species choose to be bisexual or homosexual and many of them only mate with the opposite sex to reproduce. They live as hetero- or homosexuals the rest of the time.
You can also read some history and find that homosexuality was very common among humans before Christianity was formed with its rules against it and many other things that are NORMAL.

Therefore, homosexuality is a part of the natural order of life, just like heterosexuality. Yet YOU react to it.

Anonymous also said: "I have an aversion to therapy which questions what is normal."

- your beliefs in this "god" and its rules question what is normal, based on the fact that nature has been proven to be heterosexual, bisexual and homosexual. Therefor you should have an aversion to your own beliefs.

And since you insist on dragging your "god" into this...
"Judge not lest ye be judged"


/Swedish Wiccan

Queers United said...

I can't help it, it's always fun to bring this post back for new readers, especially since I think it makes such a strong statement.

Anonymous said...

QU, you are the best! and my rant above still stands! The haters are so obsessed WITH US! So sad for them!

Unknown said...

Great post, I added it to my blog too. Thanks.

Anonymous said...

Nice questionnaire, but I'm afraid I'll take issue here. It seems to be designed to show that such questions are absurd and prejudiced. Most of them are, but questions 1 to 5 are necessary inquiries; questions that both gays and straight run away from with their myths of inateness and normality, respectively.

Anonymous said...

I find it offensive that heterosexuals continually define marriage meaning children making. I asked the same question to my mom and brother when they tried to use that excuse for not having gay marriage because she remarried after her uterus was taken out and my brother's wife could never have kids and that is one reason he married her.

As for the child molester part. Sorry, more heterosexually identifying people are child molesters.

Oh, and what about the one- Gays can get married legally, if they marry someone of the opposite sex.

This type of thinking keeps prejudice and hate alive and is responsible for 10% of married straight men cheating on their wives with men. It is responsible for your republican buddies hiding their sexuality and look for sex with cops in bathroom and hire male prostitutes and then try and deny it. It is why there are many divorces because the husband or wife has married to fit in at work or in politics.

Sham marriages do not help their hetero right wing argument on protecting marriage and the sanctity of marriage.

My marriage would not affect your marriage, and if it does, you need to reevaluate why you got married.

Mark
It is this type of insane thinking that makes

Anonymous said...

Oh, but it is good that even heterosexuals are reading your blog.

Hopefully it may change their thinking, and allow them to be better people.

Or, come out in some cases.

Mark

Laurie said...

1. What do you think caused your heterosexuality? peer presure....

2. When and where did you decide you were a heterosexual? um when George Bush screwed me
without lube first :(

3. Is it possible this is just a phase and you will out grow it? Oh yeah...I think I'm out
of it now :)

4. Is it possible that your sexual orientation has stemmed from a neurotic fear of others of the same sex? No it's my fear of mustard...

5. Do your parents know you are straight?
Um....
Do your friends know- how did they react?
not surpised....

6. If you have never slept with a person of the same sex, is it just possible that all you need is a good gay lover? HELLS YEAH I NEED
A GAY LOVER!! :D

7. Why do you insist on flaunting your heterosexuality... can’t you just be who you are and keep it quiet? I'm sorry...

8. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex? cause men think they satisify women.

9. Why do heterosexuals try to recruit others into this lifestyle? cause all the cute guys
are gay....

10. A disproportionate majority of child molesters are heterosexual... Do you consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual teachers? Oh great....Make me worry....Oh
man....

11. Just what do men and women do in bed together? How can they truly know how to please each other, being so anatomically different? men search for the g-spot while
the woman tries to guide his 'I DON'T ASK
FOR DIRECTIONS' penis to it...

12. With all the societal support marriage receives, the divorce rate is spiraling. Why are there so few stable relationships among heterosexuals? cause men are from mars
and women are from venus...

13. How can you become a whole person if you limit yourself to compulsive, exclusive heterosexuality? Oh that's a hard question.

14. Considering the menace of overpopulation how could the human race survive if everyone were heterosexual? That would suck....

15. Could you trust a heterosexual therapist to be objective? Don't you feel that he or she might be inclined to influence you in the direction of his orher leanings? And to think
I trusted my shrink....

16. There seem to very few happy heterosexuals. Techniques have been developed that might enable you to change if you really want to. I don't wanna be hetero...TAKE ME
AWAY....I DON'T WANNA BE STRAIGHT!!! Oh wait,
I'm BI :)

17. Have you considered trying aversion therapy? Is it like an 'ex-straight' camp...


TACKEL YOU HUGS!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

I'd like to respond to the gentleman who doesn't believe in global warming, and also pointed out that "The rates of suicide, depression, substance abuse and self-harming behaviors are much higher in same-sex attracted persons." Sir the reason these numbers are so much higher in homosexuals is because of the harassment, taunting, bullying, etc that they are subjected to by those like you who do not accept them, and also do not let them live in peace. Next time you try to make a point about homosexuality I'd leave out the part that actually points blame at you...

This quiz is hilarious and proves a very solid point.

Anonymous said...

lol@Shauna Baggtt

Read Anon's answer again. *laughs*

TRiG said...

There's a similar list of questions at the base of this h2g2 page: Embarrassing Questions about Sexual Orientation.

TRiG.

Hedo said...

Brilliant! I'm definitely using this as a 'survey' on myspace now!

Alana said...

great post!
really makes you think you harshly people are judged for just being themselves.

Queers United said...

Emily you are judging by suggesting that God did not intend for people to be gay. God made gay people and gay animals so it is obvious that was his intention. Why would you question his creation?

There is overwhelming Biblical evidence of Jesus affirming gay people:

http://www.wouldjesusdiscriminate.org/biblical_evidence.html

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