Sunday, August 24, 2008

Open Forum: Share Your Coming Out Story!

Coming out is a personal and/or political move to share our respective identities with our friends, family, acquaintances and the public at large. It is a very tough journey to admit to oneself, and it is an even greater battle to disclose publicly. People come out because they want to live honest and open lives without having to hide a big portion of their lives from others.

Do you have a coming out story to share? If you are not out, perhaps you can disclose your current struggle or choice to remain in the closet. Finally, if you are a straight ally, please let us know about a coming out story of someone close to you, or a situation where you had to come out as a straight ally in a crowd that was hostile to sexual & gender minorities.


Queers United said...

Coming out for me has been a journey and I have come a very long way, I am proud of myself but it has certainly been a rough few years. I originally came out to my mother at 13, I told her "i had this problem, don't worry i will change" well she loved me and supported me whether I could "change" or not. Needless to say I suffered through depression as I realized I was not changing. I slowly began coming to terms with my identity after a long struggle with dis-identifying myself from religion which had always told me that homosexuality is an abomination. Since I disavowed my belief in the bible I have begun slowly coming out to friends and family. Each time I saw that the world didn't collapse and people still loved me and treated me no differently, I came out more and more. Today I am out to almost all of my family and friends. Coming out is a lifelong process though. Even when you think you are 100% out, you will meet new people where you will need to explain yourself, your orientation, and your partner.

genevieve said...

I came out to myself as a transgender and crossdresser three years ago. I have told my wife and son and they accept me as I am. I discovered that I was trans at age 56. All my life I always felt I was diferent but never tied it to a gender problem. When it became too much I decided to find out why I felt I was different.

When I tried on my spouse's skirt, it set in motion the chain of events that led to my self-discovery. Today, I am liberated and completed as a transgender woman. I am involved with a bible study group. I firmly believe the church's position on homosexuality and trangenderism is skewed by centuries of men's prejudice, misinformation and the desire to maintain control and power over others.

I know I will come out to other people in the future. I am not ashamed of who I am nor do I feel guilty that I wear women's clothing.I've never been happier.

bridgeout said...

Here is my coming out is an ongoing process of "becoming"...

Lauren said...

A collection of my coming out stories is here. [I hope that link works].

I'm 16, so my coming outs are in small number, but each one of them makes me better, stronger. It's a very personal, emotional process, but I'd be glad to share them with anyone looking for encouragement, strength, or a good story. I remember really enjoying reading others' coming out stories before I was out, and they were great sources of courage. Hope mine can be the same.

confessionsofaclosetcase said...

whoa. your comments are interesting! um, i sort of "came out" to my parents when i was 15 or 16. that was donkey years ago (i'm now 19). anyway, they didn't take kindly to that and insisted on sending me to counselling sessions...

not too long ago, i came out to my best friend Steph. she was surprisingly calm, accepting etc. omg, i felt so relieved after spilling the beans!i did it in the most unlikely place - a fully packed Burger King. it was an impulsive decision. hahahaa, no arduous planning involved. and every second of it was nerve wrecking! but now, i'm glad i did it. i plan to come out to another friend soon. hopefully. hahaha.

i can't come out to most of my close friends cos they come from my church and they do not approve of homosexuality. that's sad isn't it?

i blogged about my coming out experience on my blog titled '5 Tips For Coming Out'. it's based on my first ever coming out experience. hahaha.


Joie Mayfield said...

This is a great great topic!

My coming out has been a very interesting journey. I've documented most of it on my blog.

Here's the best coming out story I can find.

There are other little insights found here

presetyourjet said...

I don't really have an interesting coming out story, but I've got a couple points:

- Coming out was nothing special for me, as my friends are very liberal and I just told them. But I was freaking out when I was going to tell them because I was thinking of the worst case scenario even though I'd knew they would accept me. Still haven't told my parents yet.

- However, one of the friends I came out to, she kept asking me if I wanted to tell my other friend who was living in another state if I was gay, or if it was okay that she could tell her. I was kind of pissed off with what she was doing; I like to keep my life private, and she was telling me who I should come out to. I don't think she really understood sometimes how dangerous it can be gay - that is, if you come out to the wrong person, if could be dangerous; who knows what they could do? She didn't understand that and she kept hammering me to tell everybody. I hated it. Plus for some people, I didn't think that they were entitled enough to know my sexuality.

bridgeout said...

This part is so very true, and I am glad you note this: "Coming out is a lifelong process though. Even when you think you are 100% out, you will meet new people where you will need to explain yourself, your orientation, and your partner." I would like to add that I have found it hard toHAVE to explain oneself to others that you think should love you unconditionally!

ulla said...

this is a great post. feel free to do the interview here too:

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