Monday, August 18, 2008

Word of the Gay: "Bi-curious"

A "Bi-curious" person is someone who does not identify as bisexual, yet is questioning or experimenting with their sexuality. Usually the term is used to describe heterosexuals who are interested in exploring an emotional and/or sexual relationship with the same-sex, but occasionally it has been used for homosexuals who are interested in exploring the bisexual option.

15 comments:

Diane J Standiford said...

A word I hate. Many boken hearts. I am NOT your curiousity, ya know? I love bisexuals, but don't use me. (Yeah, I'm a bitter, former, curiousity.)

Laurie said...

Well, I know I'm not curious at all. I KNOW
what I want. There is no getting around the
way I feel. I love being with both sexes.
(female more than male though)


HUGS!!!!!

CrackerLilo said...

I personally witnessed two "bi-curious" women become one very good female couple, so I don't think it's necessarily a bad thing. But I do think people need to be up front about their intentions, and if you're still "curious" after years of multiple "experiments," well, you're not even fooling yourself.

By the way, I was never "bi-curious." I had times when I didn't want to be bi (my Assemblies of God adolescence), but I've just about always been 50/50, even when I was little.

HisLoveCoversMe said...

I've never understood bisexuality. Not to insult, but I assumed the person was either sex crazed, or using it as an excuse to have same sex partners.

I guess in order to be involved with a bi-sexual one would have to be very open to his or her partner having multiple partners.

Larry in Miami said...

"bi-curious," isn't that the alternate name for AOL chat rooms?

Kid A said...

@ HisLove....

As a bisexual myself, I have been in a monogamous relationship for 5 years. Some bi's are happier with multiple partners, but many are happy with one.

Anonymous said...

I feel like there's a difference between bi-curious and bisexual. Bi-curious to me are heteroflexibles were they usually DO NOT identify as LGBTQ. Bi-curious can be a fantasy as well, eg. getting a straight man or woman sleep with a LGBTQ. I mean who really are the Bi-curious anyway? I personally have not met one ,however, I will assume that some straight pornstars who've done gay porn can be one. A sex worker can be one as well.

Anonymous said...

cont.. How about men who says they may sleep with a homosexual is they're drunk? Bisexuality to me is an equal attraction on both sexes. Some people contest this. If some1 identify as bisexual and is more attracted and slept more to the same sex, in my opinion,are not bisexuals. What ya'll think?

Queers United said...

Thanks Kid A for clarifying that, I think the amount of Bisexual people who are monogamous and the number who are polyamorous probably is similar to the general population.

CrackerLilo said...

HisLove, why is it that whenever people say "not to insult," they say something that is bracingly insulting right before or after it?

Kid A, you are more diplomatic than I am.

Anonymous, while I personally am 50/50, I respectfully disagree with your belief that bisexuals must all be 50/50 or else they become something different. Actually, among the bisexuals I know (and I know lots), being 50/50 is rare. The ones who aren't don't necessarily go where they're tilted, either. My ex-boyfriend, who claimed to be 70 percent gay (and whose eyes went that way, too) is married to another woman, and my wife's best friend, who says he's only 20 percent gay and has lots of heterosexual experience, is engaged to another man. Haven't you ever said or heard someone else say something like, "Oh, I usually don't look at bigger women, but there's something about her?" Or, "I never look at older guys that way, but I wouldn't kick Harrison Ford out of bed?" What we think we like can change, and we can make exceptions, and we may not necessarily settle down with someone who we think is our "type."

Hence the "curiosity."

Queers United said...

The whole notion of bisexuals being 50/50 is mind boggling. Since when is anything in life so evenly split, most things are not black or white but shades of gray. Sure some bi people are close to 50/50 but many are not, sexuality is fluid and lies on a continuum. I think people are starting to get the concept, I guess if you don't live as a queer its harder to comprehend.

bridgeout said...

Ah yes! A term I used a million years ago when I was hoping to find someone to help make sense of why I felt the way I did! I eventually found some help... but not at first. You go online and say you are "bi curious"? And you are easy pickins'! Thank goodness that is in the distant past!

Anonymous said...

I stand corrected CrackerLilo. What am i thinking? Thanks.

Anonymous said...

what about just falling in love with a person because you like their personality, have the same things in common, and just enjoy spending time with them? Why does everything always have to be about gender? I am bisexual and it's not about the gender to me...I don't fall in love with body parts...I fall in love with people. It just so happens that I like both sets of parts, but it is irrelevant when I'm looking for a mate. I've had great monogomous relationships with both male and female, and I really hate the assumption that bisexuality means multiple partners or threesomes. I am a one person girl and have always been faithful to whomever I'm with, male or female.

ciethe said...

sometimes I "look [in my case listen]across the fence"
but I never crossed it. ya kno wut I mean?

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